I’m nearly 30 (something) years old, and I’ve made my share of mistakes in my life. I am not much of a believer in regrets and I have learned from the many wrong turns I have taken.
And let me be the first to tell you that there are a few things I wish I had known after leaving high school, being homeless and entering the “real” world.
Are there things I would have changed? Possibly! I may never have learned some of the lessons I had and I sure could have steered away from the nuttiness of life that I embarked upon. Then again, would I be who I am today if I had not gone through what I did. The saga continues.
Looking back though, there are some things I would have told my 18-year-old self. I have taken it upon myself to share with you to prevent you from making similar decisions!
Pardon me; if I get a little wordy, it is from the heart!
- Pursue your passion, no matter what others think. This one is HUGE for me. When I looked back at my writing in high school, I amazed myself. My mind was light years from 18 yet I let others dictate my path. I knew at an early age I wanted to be an entrepreneur. I was always hustling to make money by selling Christmas cards, wrapping paper and I would walk miles. However, my parents instilled in my head that I must go to school, graduate, go to college, graduate, and get a job. BAM! Right? Wrong. Finally, 14 years later, I am FINALLY following my passion of doing what I love! Writing!
- Know how to calculate interest. My mom always said, “If you can’t pay cash, you don’t need it” If only I had listened! I was that college kid who was excited to get a credit card and thought it was free money! **This is why math and I do not get along** I found myself withering away in credit card debt with no end in sight…until I decided to cut them all up and clean my credit up. Spend wisely!
- Stress is the devil. If I had known all those times I stressed about things out of my control, I would have been in a better place. I let stress get the best of me, I lashed out at people, I shunned people, and I hurt people along the way. I also focused so much on the demands of a job, that at one point, I valued my work more than life. There is a reason why stress is one of the number one killers in America. Don’t let it get the best of you!
- Home-Ownership is not for everyone. I bought into the “American Dream” and bought a house and I hated EVERY. SINGLE. MOMENT. All those unwanted repairs, the upkeep, were just so overwhelming to me. I did the happy dance when I signed the SOLD papers in April 2012! YAHOOOOO!!!! Maybe again, one day, but not anytime soon!
- Watching TV is such a waste of time. READ MORE! If I could take back all the time from watching TV, I would be so much further in life. I am not sure how much TV I have ever watched, but I am sure it was more than the average couch potato. Who cares about Reality TV, when reality is passing you by? Reading was always a passion and I let it fall to the wayside – then I discovered the public library! GAME OVER!
- All that money I spent on an education could have been better spent (or loaned). I have learned more by reading blogs, books, networking with masterminds, and attending seminars than I ever learned in college that came with a $75K debt.
- Exercise is the essential. I was a basketball player who was in the gym at least 5 hours a day. After high school though, it began to dwindle, my body started changing and I could no longer run up and down the court without huffing and puffing. The time came when the scale tipped a number I was astonished to see, thus I changed the lifestyle and quickly. Even though I am still burning off that Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup I ate in 2005.
- Death is a part of life. Accept it. I was 26 before anyone in my family died. It was my mother. My best friend. The woman I talked to everyday on the way to work and on the way home. I even called her one day last year and started crying when she did not answer! And even though it has been 7 years, June 19th, I miss her so! Time is precious and I took it all for granted.
- Know how to manage your money. I always knew I was supposed to watch what I spend, what I buy, and how to manage my money. Bottom line, I was lazy and just wanted to have fun buying whatever I wanted when I wanted. I figured as long as I had a roof over my head, wheels to get me around, and food, I was golden. Now, I have learned, the hard way, that I must budget, plan, and be mindful of the quality of my purchase.
- The friends are much more important than the things you buy. Friendship is one of the most valuable things I have ever come across. Value them. Cherish them. Your friends will be essential in your growth and quality of life.
- Leave the DRAMA for someone else. Just like watching TV, drama is a time waster! Drama drains you and brings you down. Most likely it is coming from someone whose life is less than great and they want to bring you down with them. Misery loves company!
- It’s ok to be different. Embrace it. I grew up in a small country town. I was the only Asian. I was different and my peers made sure I knew that every day. When I was released into the “wild” aka “the real world” – I embraced my “differentness” because there were other like me and they accepted me! Love my Asians!
- That journal you kept. Keep writing in it. Your mind is one of your most treasured assets. It holds memories. It holds information. Capture these moments as often as you can so that you can share them with your kids one day. Write down your mistakes, your trials and tribulations, your happy days, your excitement. They will love you for this.
- When you are at a giving up point, KEEP GOING! While this may sound easy, when you are the one in the situation, you want to throw in the towel, you want o give up, you want someone to save you. Reality check. YOU MUST KEEP GOING! You have this all under control and you can make anything happen. There are times when life is going slap you with a cold pork chop, but you know what? You will learn and grow from this experience, so have your 3 minutes of pity – then get up and change the course!
- BELIEVE IN YOURSELF! THIS IS KEY! If you can see it, you can be it. If you can dream it, you can be it. Always believe in your strength and abilities and NEVER let anyone else tell you otherwise! I should have remembered this from my high school basketball coach and taken it to heart! Instead, I tucked it away in a box with a key that was found many years later!
Your turn! Share with me a few things you wish you had followed when you were 18, starting out in life. What would you go back and tell yourself!
From my fingertips to your eyes